Death on the Nile

Despite my wife being big fans of them, I've never read an Agatha Christie novel, though I do have a couple in my "need to read" pile that's a mile long.

Thanks to tons of COVID delays and the absurdly weird Armie-Hammer-being-a-cannibal-question-mark?-thing, Death on the Nile is releasing nearly 5 years after Murder on the Orient Express. 

Its Kenneth Branagh-directed predecessor (this one is directed by him too) seems to have earned high marks with me, but for the life of me I can't really remember all that many details from it. I remember being impressed with the twist and that it was a fun, glossy, one-time view but - in fairness - I probably overrated it a bit. 

Death on the Nile takes another Agatha Christie book, coupled with an awesome setting and a group of people on a boat instead of a train this time, once again unleashing Hercule Poirot and his mustache to solve the case. 

Though they are different enough films, it's clear Branagh is establishing a particular vibe and style for these novels-turned-murder-mysteries that works well enough, but never allows them to become anything more special. That somewhat awkward approach goes right down to the advertising, Orient Express featuring an oddly misplaced Imagine Dragons song in trailers and all the adds I've heard for this one similarly have an out of place rock song about a 1930s murder of really rich people...whaatttt?

Anyway, Death on the Nile earns all the same points as Orient Express and little else. I enjoyed it more, likely because of the exotic setting, but this is still only ever going to be a one time view for me and that's made even more concrete due to its 2+ hour-ish runtime. It feels like a long 2 hours and for a while, the film falls into a familiar trap that causes it to sag a lot. Poirot interviews a suspect. Poirot accuses that suspect. Suspect vehemently denies. New facts come to light. Poirot moves on to next suspect. Rinse and repeat. To a certain extent, Poirot's ineffectiveness as a detective - particularly in this film - is almost comedic and it feels as if Branagh leans into that in fun ways at times. Ultimately however, the conclusion is the "best bit" and I was actually truly surprised with the outcome, though once one of the whodunnit threads comes unraveled, I was able to put the whole thing together before the scene could wrap up. That's part of the fun of these things and in the sense of keeping you guessing until the very end, I found Death on the Nile to do as good of a job as its predecessor by dropping small clues, making you forget them, then surprising you at the end. 

"I don't need a wedding cake darling. I'll just eat you."
[everyone else]: "Ummmmm"

Our cast has some heavy hitters and by the end of the film it feels like you can separate into side characters where you're still unsure of their names (and sometime their relations) and the main people who earn their screentime. Gal Gadot is obviously front and center as she usually is, along with Kenneth Branagh hamming up his accent. Armie Hammer's character is a huge horndog, which has not aged well unless you get some laughs from dark humor (I was definitely chuckling in my mind) and he's largely forgettable here. Russell Brand plays the quietest and most reserved character I think he'll ever come across and too does fine, but is forgettable, and feels miscast. Luckily there are a couple dark horse MVPs outside of Gadot and Branagh in Letitia Wright and Emma Mackey. Wright's character is definitely a side one, but she just brings presence to the role that makes her stand out. And, as a big fan of Sex Education on Netflix, I'm delighted that Emma Mackey has gotten a bigger break, holding her own against many big stars here. Sure, she may be "discount Margot Robbie" right now, but she's incredibly talented and a joy to watch from everything I've seen. 

For being delayed so long, I was actually disappointed to see Death on the Nile have such a forgettable original score and examples of awful CGI. By and large, this is a big, schmoozy affair where a bunch of [mostly] rich people are celebrating the marriage of two rich people. The production values are strong for the period setting, even if the cinematography never really makes it special, but I found some of the special effects of the pyramids, ruins, and even animals along the Nile to be awful given how much time they had to clean it up. On more than a few occasions, the green screen backgrounds just take you right out of it and feel hard to forgive, but are thankfully short. 

"Unhand her, sir! There will be no cannibalism along this river today!"

Death on the Nile may - depending on performance - earn enough of a keep to get us a 3rd Agatha Christie movie from Branagh. These are fun, if not too long and somewhat repetitive, but the ending usually has great payoff. If there was another one, I'd likely see it, but probably out of a combination of obligation and interest now because I know exactly what I'll be getting served. 

CONS

• Big glossy feel somewhat prohibits these from ever being anything more special
• Gets into a repetitive pattern for ~ 30 minutes where Poirot just accuses everyone
• Some truly bad CGI in a few spots
• Couple side characters feel unexplored and I'd argue there are some miscasts (e.g. Russell Brand)
• Phoned-in original score

PROS

• Big, glossy feel - while holding it back - also gives it a fun almost "Gatsby"-ish vibe
• Exotic setting is more interesting this time
• Mystery is built well, with clues throughout. The ending was truly a "Oh damn!" moment and I enjoyed trying to mentally unravel the rest before the film could tell me
• It's the most fun part of these films
• Cast full of heavy hitters. Gadot and Branagh are obvious stars but the silent MVPs go to Letitia Wright and Emma Mackey
• Some impressive CGI outside of the bad bits
• Outside of CGI, the production values can dazzle
• Very solid one-time view

Rath's Review Score | 7/10