Mortdecai

I had an extremely difficult decision this weekend...

Go see Johnny Depp in his latest bomb?

Or go see Jennifer Lopez in hers?

Yep, you guessed it. Now that I've caught up with many of the limited releases from last year, it's time for the January doldrums; films that it would seem the distributers know aren't all that good so they have banished them to the beginning of the year when movie attendance is often low (which, interestingly enough has not been happening this year with the breakout success of American Sniper). Out of the two previously mentioned choices, I was most interested in Mortdecai (as opposed to J-Lo's Boy Next Door) because I wanted to see if it really was as bad as the critics were saying it was. Would this be the film that kills Depp's career and leaves it on ice, pending a revival years from now? Truly, as a fan of some of Depp's films, it's been a sad time to watch his career slowly wither away from the blockbuster hits he used to produce. At the end of the day though, he type-casted himself into a corner, and it's a corner that audiences are no longer particularly fond of unless the word "Pirates" is attached to the title. Based on the somewhat lackluster previews, Mortdecai seemed no different as it's yet another example of Depp portraying a wonderfully odd and goofy character. Early critic reviews have been destroying it, resulting in what will probably be one of the lowest Metacritic scores of 2015 once it is all said and done. I questioned, "It can't be that bad can it?"

No, it can't. Mortdecai is no where near the best and/or funniest comedy in the world, but my God, were the critics far too harsh on this one or what I like to reserve some of my lowest scores for films that are truly bad...ones that make you angry you wasted time and money on them and that make you feel dumber for watching them. Mortdecai is not one of those films and while I will most likely barely remember it come March, that doesn't mean it deserves some of the scores it was getting.

I wish it was the customary greeting in America...

Metaphor for Depp's career?

Mortdecai is a comedy that is never really outright funny. I think I laughed out loud once, but that's not to say it isn't funny at all. I would say that about half of the jokes/gags/situations landed on the side of "funny" while the other half did not. It's not necessarily a "funny" comedy as much as it is an amusing one. It's fun to watch Depp and crew globetrot around the world and get themselves into amusing situations that, while it may not have you busting your gut, it will provide you with a small smile. Depp, as always, fully commits to the role and Mortdecai is a goofy, slightly dimwitted character that seems to be a combination of Monty Python Englishmen and Mr. Bean. Paul Bettany, who plays his manservant, has a couple running gags that get some laughs, as does Ewan McGregor and Gwyneth Paltrow. It's really Depp's show and despite the career slumpage, he can still lead a film with the best of them. Plot-wise Mortdecai is nothing special as it deals in the world of stolen art. I was never really fascinated by it, nor did I really care about the outcome, but rarely is plot a huge focus in a silly comedy like this one. The twists and turns weren't shocking in the slightest, but who really cares?

My main issues with Mortdecai are with its run time (nearly two hours at 106 minutes) and its R-rating. The runtime was an issue that I knew going in and I couldn't help but notice all the areas where the film could have used a trimming. There are several unnecessary and unfunny scenes scattered throughout that don't serve a purpose. Furthermore, why in God's name was this movie rated R? I heard two f-bombs and everything else was well within the realm of PG-13. Given that the film was such a huge bomb at the box office this weekend, I question why the studio didn't simply cut one of the "f**ks" out and make the film instantly more accessible.

"Wait why did we go for an R-rating again?"

It's hard to talk anymore about Mortdecai because it falls in that category of "painfully average". Given that I didn't pay much to see it, I didn't hate my time with Mortdecai. On the contrary, I enjoyed it to a small degree. It may be a comedy where only about half of the jokes hit their mark and is about 15 minutes too long, but that doesn't make it nearly as terrible as most critics as making it out to be.

What it makes it is this: an average afternoon at the theater that will make you smile, but one that you probably won't recall next week, much less at the end of the year.

CONS:

• A significant amount of jokes just aren't funny
• Too long for a silly comedy
• It's rated R but often acts like a PG film with sprinkles of PG-13 sexual innuendo. This "bomb" was due mostly to this odd film rating
• Many unnecessary scenes that could have been trimmed
• Uninteresting plots
• Underused Olivia Munn and Jeff Goldblum

PROS:

• Depp is well immersed in the character and provides several laughs and funny quirks
• The rest of the principal cast does well enough
• A few jokes are funny and most of the film's running gags are pretty good, the best of which is kissing the moustache
• It's dumb fun and doesn't pretend to be much more than that

Rath's Review Score: 5/10